Love is priceless, but can it still become a commodity? Often, unloved children have a lot of money, yet they can't purchase it. Perhaps it isn't something that can be bought? We have become entangled in a spider's web of searching for love, not knowing how to replace it and with what. We have started to fear our hildren. Initially, we fear our inner child, so we keep it asleep.. It's better to let it rest because if it awakens, we're afraid of what we might discover about ourselves. With the facade of being a complete person, we continue our sleepwalking life with half conscious existance. We try to mask the pain and build our brilliant careers, individuality, and existence, ultimately crafting a "reputation." All this continues until we realize how much we've grown. Egoism expands, prestige is nurtured, titles are earned, but the child remains asleep. Then we continue to try to meet all expectations, and we continue to build our tower in the form of a labyrinth, on the path to happiness. A new task is assigned to that old child: we must create a family. Society is waiting. Fear of the new child emerges. How can we raise a healthy new child, while the other one is still sick? Thankfully no one knows about that. We decide not to awaken the old child because through the new one, everything will be resolved. Unexpressed emotions, lack of love, helplessness, unspoken needs, suppressed feelings of inadequacy, unfulfilled dreams. Everything that hurt us, the new child can alleviate with enough bandages, by covering the wounds. However, coming into the world, the new child soon realizes that the bandages cannot alleviate the pain and the wound will not heal. Then, so small and unfamiliar with the world, it accepts the pain as love. It begins to hurt even more and asks for help, but since it does not receive it, it continues to believe it is love, so it spreads it.
The new child believes it is benefiting the old one by achieving all the aspirations the old one couldn't fulfill. It aims to make it proud, striving to earn love through imposed values and others' expectations. The old child continues to strengthen its superficial armor of a cold-blooded warrior. With a higher salary and new recognition, the feeling of inferiority will fade as its "reputation" grows. The old child often thinks: "Once I buy another car, I'll prove my worth to the child, enhancing its value alongside mine.". However in moments of weakness, the feeling of rejection appears again, and a new thought begins as a tool for fighting emotions. " I'll master another skill to demonstrate my greatness, and the child will understand the power of influence. I can even put them in a dependent position for a little while, my established status allows it." Thoughts build on each other like bricks of a house with a crumbling foundation. Then emotions stir in the new child. Jealousy begins to surface, and vanity enveleops it. "No one can have more and be better than me," the new child often thinks, unaware that the old one always compared itself to relatives' children and lacked affection in those times. A cry for love emerges, but never having felt it, the child doesn't know what it looks like, continuing to follow the familiar path of pain. The new child adheres to safe patterns, earning rewards and recognition, while the old one acquires more possessions, showing gratitude to the new child.
One Wednesday, a new child was sitting in the doctor's waiting room, observing the family seated across from it. At that moment, a school friend hurried over rushed to hug its mother. Seeing this, the child wanted to ask its parent for the same gesture, but then the old child awoke and the parent didn't know how to offer it. It felt unnatural and odd. Except when this scene wasn't performed in front of an audience seeking recognition and admiration. Soon afterwards, parent felt a secure sense of comfort. Praise is essential, and it becomes more enjoyable knowing it will boost its ego further. A sense of peace arises in the body when the new child has as much or more than the child sitting opposite. The attention is present: "I guess it's the same as love", the new child thinks. Everyone is waiting the same in that waiting room, but the children experience different emotions.
The new child keeps growing with the same bandage, now covered with fresh plasters that appear disinfected on the outside. The wound is becoming more profound, and the pain is becoming more subdued since crying is permitted only behind closed doors. Our children are growing up in this kind of society today, and it is up to us to either allow the wounds to deepen or to address and understand our inner pain, allowing the injuries to heal so future generations can be healthy.
There must be no margin for purchasing love. We should first understand what love truly is so that we could offer it to ourselves, then to our children, and ultimately to society as a whole.
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